{"id":1100,"date":"2021-07-14T16:44:46","date_gmt":"2021-07-14T16:44:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/?p=1100"},"modified":"2021-07-14T16:44:48","modified_gmt":"2021-07-14T16:44:48","slug":"carse-wandering-by-roddie-mckenzie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/?p=1100","title":{"rendered":"Carse Wandering by Roddie McKenzie"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-rich is-provider-soundcloud wp-block-embed-soundcloud wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Carse Wanderings by Roddie McKenzie. Read by Greg Powrie by Pitlochry Festival Theatre\" width=\"1200\" height=\"400\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https:\/\/w.soundcloud.com\/player\/?visual=true&#038;url=https%3A%2F%2Fapi.soundcloud.com%2Ftracks%2F1043195122&#038;show_artwork=true&#038;maxheight=1000&#038;maxwidth=1200\"><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>April 2<sup>nd<\/sup>, 2020<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So, I\u2019d drive out to Kingoodie &nbsp;\u2013 I\u2019ve got the cabin fever bad &nbsp;\u2013 can\u2019t take any more of the prime monkey\u2019s bullshit on the telly. I have worn out the pavements round by the house and I\u2019m sick of all these numpties that don\u2019t get socially distancing &nbsp;\u2013 crowding you on the pavement, in shops&nbsp;\u2013 they wouldn\u2019t know a yardstick of two metres if it hit them in the face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s why I am out here with you- I need to get away from people, need to get away from myself, maybe. If I walk far enough, I might leave the depression behind.&nbsp; Don\u2019t know why I am telling you this&nbsp;\u2013 It\u2019s not your problem, but there is nobody else to listen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And falling out with her leaves me alone in these loneliest of times. I can\u2019t blame her &#8211; difficult times, mental health&#8230;the perfect storm.&nbsp; When we bust up before, I ran around the park as though I could batter all the hurt and loss out of me each time my feet pounded the track.&nbsp; This isn\u2019t as bad, apart from the old man being sick, but I need something to stop that rising need to freak out:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8211; to burst out like a gushing oil well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8211; to neck a bottle of tequila<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8211; to smoke all the weed that I can get my hands on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But I know that will not help.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And you know that&nbsp;\u2013 so why am I telling you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Maybe I am looking for re-assurance. You\u2019re constant, you\u2019re predictable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&nbsp;Easter sunshine gilds<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>the pastel shades of the land,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>A terrible beauty of birdsong.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&nbsp;April 12<sup>th<\/sup><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Hello again. I see the wild cherry blossoms along the lane, their pink petals already falling&nbsp;\u2013 like all the lives taken by the virus &nbsp;\u2013 the old man, one of them. No surprise, a real coffin dodger for more than twenty years I\u2019ve lived and relived this day.&nbsp; But he kept coming back like Lazarus.&nbsp; This at least put an end to his pains; he had no quality of life&nbsp;\u2013 he told me himself.&nbsp; Just crap that we could not send him off like he wanted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I like your silence.&nbsp; It soothes me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Sakura &nbsp;\u2013<\/em> <em>I am saddened to hear of&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>the 563 petals<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>that fell yesterday<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>in yesterday\u2019s chill wind,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8230;with one bigger than<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>all the others.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>May 8<sup>th<\/sup><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Aye, it\u2019s me again.&nbsp; I think coming out to see you is working&nbsp;\u2013 no meltdowns.&nbsp; Me and my lass are speaking again \u2013 you probably saw her yesterday when we came visiting. She likes it here too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>A spring landscape, luscious in life green,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Marsh Marigolds light up the burn with reflected candle-like light;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>as if lit, for hope.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>June 23<sup>rd<\/sup><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>High summer now, the virus is in retreat.&nbsp; Not normality yet.&nbsp; I take joy in seeing you in your full green glory.&nbsp;&nbsp; She loves you too. It\u2019s crap that we can\u2019t go abroad for a holiday, but we picnic in your woods and on your beaches.&nbsp; Man &nbsp;\u2013 it\u2019s boiling.&nbsp; Closer together each week eh?&nbsp; All of us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Invergowrie Bay swaps colours<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>on the receding waters and light<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>in the twilight sky.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Wine catches slivers of sunlight<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>as it cascades into the glass.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>All together,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>it <strong>could<\/strong> be the Aegean.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>September 17<sup>th<\/sup><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Nippy, isn\u2019t it? Here we are in the bonfire days of the year.&nbsp; She loved the berry picking and making sloe gin and raspberry jam last week- you provide more than just spiritual support.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Hedges hold a bounty of berries.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Brambles, globular, like haematite, an impression of black metal,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>but dispelled by a touch of their juice-swollen bodies, that explode<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>tart and sweet simultaneously, on the tongue<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>December 24<sup>th<\/sup><\/strong><em><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>No need to ask you how <strong>you\u2019re<\/strong> doing?&nbsp; Whatever happens, nothing stops you &nbsp;\u2013 you just keep on with your eternal cycle&nbsp;\u2013 and that is re-assuring.&nbsp; Good to be here with you, even if it is a driech day and the virus is rising again.&nbsp; But the jag works and when we all get that, it will blooter the wee bastard. After what we have been through, we are tough enough now for anything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Just to let you know \u2013 I have moved back in with her \u2013 all copacetic now, but a major shout out to you for helping me keep the heid.&nbsp; I owe you so much.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You\u2019ll no see her out till Spring \u2013 she\u2019s a cold tattie, but I\u2019ll be visiting- want to see you in your winter glory. I\u2019ll away now.&nbsp; Cheerio \u2013 and thanks!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; &#8212;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>The fields are ploughed &#8211; all maroon corduroy &#8211; ready to accept the seeds of the new future.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>The trees are now black. Dendritic, like nerve cells sprouting from the land.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>As I approach, birds flee between them, like dopamine shot between my neurons<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a><em>as I gorge on the dying beauty of the day.<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ***<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">By Roddie McKenzie<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><a href=\"http:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Winter_fields_-_geograph.org_.uk_-_1628589.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" src=\"http:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Winter_fields_-_geograph.org_.uk_-_1628589.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-1102\" srcset=\"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Winter_fields_-_geograph.org_.uk_-_1628589.jpg 640w, https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Winter_fields_-_geograph.org_.uk_-_1628589-600x399.jpg 600w, https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Winter_fields_-_geograph.org_.uk_-_1628589-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Part diary, part poem and part conversation, this is a journey of discovery which shows us the restorative power of the countryside.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":1094,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"neve_meta_sidebar":"","neve_meta_container":"","neve_meta_enable_content_width":"","neve_meta_content_width":0,"neve_meta_title_alignment":"","neve_meta_author_avatar":"","neve_post_elements_order":"","neve_meta_disable_header":"","neve_meta_disable_footer":"","neve_meta_disable_title":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[11,13,123,15,109,22,49,46],"class_list":["post-1100","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories","tag-2020news-covid","tag-covid19","tag-depression","tag-dundee","tag-fiction","tag-nethergate-writers","tag-pitlochry-festival-theatre","tag-poetry"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1100","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1100"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1100\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1125,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1100\/revisions\/1125"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1094"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1100"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1100"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nethergatewriters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1100"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}